Kid's Fun

Of Three Year Old Paintings.

I’ve been paranoid of my keyboard. Don’t ask me why because I’m not sure myself. But I know I must type to break the power it is taunting over me.:)

We survived a year. We got through the first anniversary of Kierra’s great triumphant ushering into Heaven. I won’t pretend it was easy or pretty. I didn’t always think very kind thoughts toward my Heavenly Father. I cried some pretty big crocodile tears. But I also found peace and hope and love holding me at the end of the night.

It’s not like the night is totally over. It never will be until we live forever with the Son who is the LIGHT and there is NO NIGHT there. The night time of the soul is never my favorite part of life to grope through. But if we had no night here on earth, there would be no morning. No dawning. No fresh hope and courage and the knowledge that if God got you through this far, He has no intention of leaving you to face any darkness alone without His arms to carry you.

There were some AMAZING sunrises and sunsets in January. I will post some of the miraculous colors later. But it’s after 10 PM and I should be in bed. I just had to write a few lines to break this silent spell that is trying to take me captive. The last few days have actually been good. Steve and Kobe and I are all healthy and happy. Despite all the exciting things God has been surprising me with in my life, I still have this restless feeling. I think I’m simply homesick. For Heaven. And Kierra. And my Jesus.

I sat here tonight, curled up on our broken overstuffed chair that Kierra always used to hang out in and looked through her paintings. I was hoping it would make me feel closer to her. I was longing for one little touchable wonderful thing that was totally HER.


Like these sweet brush strokes.

They made me happy and I remembered how pleased she was to paint them. How she beamed and wiggled when Stephen complimented her on how awesome it was. But part of me was sad too. Because everything she did was through me. I helped her hold her brush. I dipped it in paint. I nudged her hand forward to swipe across the page.

And an awful lonely feeling plagued me. What had she left that that was truly her? What had she done that was JUST Kierra? I sat here, feeling lost and lonely and a bit upset at God. He had seen her first steps. Heard her first sentence. Didn’t I deserve that as a Mommy? Wasn’t she MY little girl? The one I had seen on the ultrasound, and heard her first cry? Gazed into her tiny scrunchy face? And felt my heart melt?

And it felt like there was nothing but memories left for me. Sometimes the grip of pain tries really, really hard to suck the breath clear out of the lungs.


I founds these words in her art book. And while I scripted them and drew the sun, I know without a shadow of a doubt that those are typical Kierra scribbles below.

I felt God whisper to me that I am more like Kierra then I will ever know. We all are.

“For in Him we LIVE and MOVE and have our being.”… KJV Bible

We couldn’t lift one little bitty finger or breath one whoosh of lung if it weren’t for our God. HE gives us the power and potential that carries us through our days. From when we wake to when we are asleep and all the time that morphs together between those hours. We are in His. In His total control. (And we think we have so much control over our bodies and emotions:). 🙂

HE gives us the courage and creativity to paint the canvas of our lives. HE gives us the intellect and laughter and compassion to live out our dreams. It’s all a Master piece. And while He never forces us to color in the lines, He does give us grace to allow Him to create beauty from our scribbling.

I think someday HE will make it up to us. (As if we are indebted to Him.) I can NEVER repay Him for the change and grace and forgiveness He has brought to my heart.

But honestly. I still sometimes feel a bit cheated that I never got to see my daughter fully express herself. You know what? Gods got a reason for what He does.

He never causes pain without some purpose. He does not waste tears or shrug off our grief. He has something “out of this world” beautiful in mind for you and me! He has a surprise we can’t begin to imagine. He created us exactly the way He wanted us. With our own unique longings and dreams and talents. Because we were created to glorify Him here on Earth…but ultimately , we were MADE for HEAVEN!!
And thats where we will find our deepest longings filled!!!
My little Kierra is living the dream! I can’t wait to join her!


Kid's Fun

Painting Rocks For Kierra

This past weekend has marked the two months of missing our little Kierra. In one way, it seems like two years! My little human mind cannot fathom eternity, if two months here on earth have stretched this long! Friends have been so kind to us over the past few months. I’ve had plenty of things to do, and also time at home to remember and grieve and try to come to grips with our new life. Sometimes the lonesomesness and missing Kierra is so suffocating and final. I can also think of her with a peacefully feeling, though. A grand sense of freedom and release and happiness. Because she is truly free and living to her full potential right now. Her body is brand new and her spirit is released to be all she was created to be. As glorious as that is, the hard part is not knowing what that is like. Our little girl has changed and with it comes the earthly limitations on our mind that cannot grasp what she is really like now. Parents want to KNOW there children. They want to be in touch with their feelings and personality and likes and dislikes. I just can’t get my mind around what Kierra is like or what she is doing or experiencing right now. That hurts. It makes me feel shut out and lonely. I just can’t wait to meet her all over a long awaited for, perfect birth. This time, we will ALL be brand new…and can love in a completion we can’t comprehend.

The other day, I had to clear my head, and Kobe needed fresh air, so we wandered down to the creek, and gathered some rocks.


I washed them and layed on the kitchen window sill to dry. A few days later, Joanna, Crystal, and Alisha came over for the day. We were all in shock from the horrific accident that claimed the life of one of their friends.  It made us miss Kierra also, all over again.

I had just come across a great websight that explained how to crayon paint on wood, canvas, rocks, etc. So we popped the now dry rocks in the oven and  pulled out the crayons and made little memory rocks for Kierra.This was the result.



I heated the rocks in the oven at about 200 degrees, then we drew on them with crayons. The crayons melted on the hot rocks and created a lovely kind of paint. We used water color paint and paint brushes to add more detail. Then I sprayed them with a clear sealer since I wanted to put them at her grave marker until we get a memorial stone for her.Kobe and I went over to the graveyard on a lovely spring day and placed them by her grave.


You are my sunshine, SWEETHEART!

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fly happy, sweet one, on the wispiest of wings





Kid's Fun

Our Indoor Hammock

Need some entertainment for your children these winter days?


Kobe is so thrilled with his new swing! 🙂 The best part is that it is also a hammock…a toy sling and any other imaginable thing a two year old makes of it.

Kierra uses it for her rock a bye comfort. I add a folded blanket for her head so she is more comfy. She didn’t just totally fall in love yet, with all her bellyaching, but it’s still a fun thing to do with her.

It’s as simple as knotting two bed sheets together (or maybe a king size knotted by himself) and there you got it…a wonderful indoor swing to beat this January freeze. Oh, and did I mention that it’s portable? 🙂
Kierra had one wonderful day this past week. She was relaxed and comfy and all into sitting in her Kid Cart with the new tray and the pummel for between her knees. We are loving the tray, since it brings things right to her level. The pummel works wonderful in helping her not do her ‘scootchy’ down thing anymore!
Kobe got up on her level too and they played with playdough for a long time.

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Isn’t that just such a typical boy! 🙂 And look at her ‘yuck’ face. I LOVE this picture! It’s so rare to catch her expressions like this…they are so fleeting and brief. When they pop out, I just smile to see the little girl breaking through!

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She’s still struggling with lots of gas pains and air bubbles in her tummy, which still causes bouts of reflux. Thankfully, it’s not as constant as it was, but we are still praying for more relief for her. Any suggestions?

Kobe and I went to church yesterday for the first time in weeks. Steve stayed home and kept Kierra comfy. I was so refreshed in going! One of the verses from Habakkuk the speaker read stuck with me…

…”Look and be amazed!

I am doing something in your own day.

Something you wouldn’t believe

even if someone told you about it.”

Isn’t that just wonderful and amazing! (and scary if we wouldn’t have God) God’s got some big plans for your life, no matter how small you feel, or how many things in your life don’t make sense right now.

‘It’s so good to know the Maker of our hearts!’

DIY Projects · Kid's Fun

Terra Cotta Christmas Crafting

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The Christmas countdown has begun.

I am having a very hard time getting into the Christmas spirit this year. This makes me sad. Maybe all these weird confusing swirling emotions that I can’t really place my finger on  will gradually settle to rest like the ending of the blizzard winds.  If I keep hoping and looking for cheer and gladness; if I keep believing;  the gift of our Saviour’s  love WILL grace my life.

I want to enjoy the moment and live with happiness in my heart and a clear view of God’s blessing in our  life.

We don’t have a nativity scene and I really wanted one to tell my kids the Christmas Story. Lucky for me, Pintrest was just a few clicks away. Easier then a bundle up and shopping trip. I bet it’s quite a bit cheaper too 🙂

I had chanced upon a whole box of terra cotta pots one summer in MT at a yard sale and bought them with happy thoughts of painting them into adorable creations. Now I had the perfect plan for them!

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A cardboard box, (one of many of Kierra’s empty formula boxes:) scraps of fabric, crafter’s paint, extra Christmas ornaments, and of course the glue and bits of string and ribbon.

My glue gave me awful issues. I ran out of hot glue immediately. So I used a bit of crazy glue (and still have remains on my finger 🙂 then I switched to elmer’s glue.  I  painted it in a thin layer with a paint brush since I really, really wanted this thing to hold together! lol

Joseph got a blue coat, Mary a yellow coat, and baby Jesus a kingly purple coat.

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I used a cotton ball for the baby’s head 🙂 We bundled them up warmly, and added white angels with musical fabric and ribbons for halos. Then we made them a little camo cave, and added dry beans for a walkway and a ‘fireplace’ 🙂 We’ll see how long it goes until Kobe has all of them picked off. I painted a path of glue on the fabric to make the beans stick. They are just a bit too tempting for him to peel off and feed to the ‘horsh’ and the ‘baa baa’ 🙂

So here’s our little table top nativity scene.

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Perfect for little fingers to play with.

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I found one more cute use for the terra pots .

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They add some wonderful color to our house! I used a long wooden skewer to stack the ornaments on. The skewers had a pine cone on one end from a previous life,  which actually made it easier for me. I have seen this done with knitting needles as well, but since I don’t have the slightest clue how to knit, there was none floating around my stash of hoarded odd things.

I think I need to go mix up a batch of Christmas Sugar cookies since our ‘all -day- waited -for -snow’ has began to fall.

Yesterday, I had Kierra to the doctor with a few minor concerns. He thought she may have a pneumonia type infection beginning and also noticed she had  considerably more  fluid retention then a few weeks ago, so we plan to stay snug and warm at  home and hope the medication and our loving Father brings relief for her. Thankfully, she doesn’t feel bad today.

Stay warm and blessed this weekend!

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DIY Projects · Kid's Fun

The Festive Scarecrow

We needed some autumn colors in our house. Some country mood. Some crafty project. So we broke out the crate of scrap paper from behind the bed. (it’s no wonder it kinda collects dust bunnies since it’s a stand on your head, stretch your ribs, blood rush to your face kind of  dive to haul it out!)

I had seen an idea to create your own scarecrows with old Pringles cans on a web sight recently. Since I didn’t have the patience to go find it again, I gathered supplies we had in our house and relied on my memory and imagination. We spread out on the living room floor under the furiously whirling ceiling fan and picked out bright sheets of paper. I love doing crafts with my kids, but their attention span seems a nanosecond. Maybe that’s a slight stretch since a nanosecond is actually only 1 billionth of a second, but you get the idea… sometimes it feels that way!


Out of the tearing paper and ‘It’s OK, Kierra, just relax.’ and the ‘Kobe! Do not play with glue’…

These little guys emerged. I was slapping them together at the end, so I’m sure if you have creative kids and more time and concentration, yours could evolve quite a bit more handsomely 🙂

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1. Use an empty Pringles can for the body. (we used an empty powered drink tube)

2. Cut paper (or fabric) into strips and glue around the can to create the body.

3. Use burlap fabric scraps or torn paper scraps to patch the clothes.

4. Add a mouth, nose, and eyes.

5. Add suspenders or buttons or both.

6. Crumple a wad of paper and tape it to the lid of the can.

7. Cut a big round circle of paper (or felt or burlap) for the hat.

8. Cover the lid (including the paper wad 🙂 with the round paper and secure it with a piece of string. Trim off any excess hat paper and turn up the edges a bit to create a brim.

9. Use long strips of paper for the arms. Fold a small tab over on one end of the strip. Glue it to the side of the body. Then let the ‘arm’ hang down over the tab. I put a few folds in one guy’s arm to add some wiggle.

Enjoy your festive scarecrows! 🙂

Hint: (I’d love to see what your kids create 🙂


DIY Projects · Kid's Fun

Modern Art and Fingerpaints

We had so much fun the other day! I found a simple recipe for water color paint that Kobe quickly turned into finger paint. We simply mixed these ingredients together, and spread out the layers of newspaper and nice heavy acrylic painting paper…


3 tsp. corn syrup

6 T. cornstarch

6 T. baking soda

6 T. white vinegar

food coloring.

I mixed all the ingredients together, then divided it into muffin tins before adding the foods coloring. I was afraid the food coloring would stain the kids, but it washed off very well. This makes quite a bit of paint. I think I will stick with half batch next time!

ImageKobe was totally thrilled to be shirtless and artsy. Before i knew it, he was diggin in with his hands, watching the drips…

Imageand rubbing them in..

ImageI helped Kierra paint her masterpiece. She loved it..for a bit:)

ImageThen Kobe got to slinging paint and sampling it..and spitting 🙂


ImageSo we wrapped up our fun little time, dumped the muddied paint colors down the drain, and headed for the shower.

Super simple. Super fun.

(they  made their own Mother’s Day gift without even realizing it:)

Kid's Fun

February Valentines

Valentines day is one of my favorite days of the year. So favorite, that I celebrate it for weeks 🙂

We received word Friday morning that Courtney Miller (9 yr) had passed away in CO. She and Kierra both were diagnosed with Yoder Dystonia. It was a hard day for me. I can’t imagine how hard it was for Jenny and Erv. Our prayers have been winged their way OFTEN!

Since i couldn’t seem to concentrate on work too well, the kiddos and i baked cookies.

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Kobe ate enough dough for everyone. And Kierra made a special valentine for her Best Daddy!

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Kierra even got flour on her toes 🙂

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Afterward, Kobe sat beside the stove and sang to us.

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he’s such a cheerful little guy. it does my heart good!

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He had to have a bath after the coating of flour and cookie dough.

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Any wonder that I’m nuts about him?:)

The fun thing about two kiddos is  snuggle time watching Old MacDonald.

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And watching them wake up.

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And fall asleep.

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Today, I am thankful for the gift of life God has given us. All we can really do, is seize the moment. Cherish each other. And know that God is there. And There. And THERE. (as i point my finger at each thing that is an issue for me right now.)

He will be there. too. No matter what tomorrow brings.

Happy February! Show your loved ones and your sweet children how special they are.

because this life is only a breath.